While out of town for a little anniversary getaway, I passed a woman in the crowd wearing a shirt that had a surprising quote on it. I was as surprised by the quote as I was to see who was wearing it. The gal wearing it was tall, extremely attractive, well-groomed, wearing expensive jewelry, and appeared to be in her mid-fifties if I had to guestimate her age. The shirt shared this insight…
I’m usually about
Live, laugh, love and dance
today, it’s more like
raise, aim, fire, and reload
I suppose wearing a shirt like this might help you keep your place in line or assure better than average service in a few places. It certainly let the public know this lady was what we say as, ticked off, seeing red, had a bone to pick. Outwardly, as I rushed to judgment, my take was, ” what did she have to be so mad about? She seemed so poised, so together. It appeared she had everything going for her. But like many other things, looks can be deceiving. It reminds me anger can be like hot lava below the earth, Just a simmering away. We are not lacking in our idioms concerning expressing our anger in our culture. Anger costs our culture tons of money like property damage, liability suits surrounding assaults, court costs, tickets for disturbing the peace, higher insurance rates due to increased incidence of road rage. As a people, we are, as my Papaw said, madder than wet hens. Though we express our anger, most often, we are not releasing it. Despite the increased frequency of adult temper tantrums and blowing our tops, more often than not, we don’t get to the bottom of our anger and sometimes even seethe over the things that frustrate us. And when we do get to the root of it, what do we do with it or about it? Confessing that we are angry is probably part of the remedy, and I guess wearing a t-shirt qualifies as some version of confession that is good for the soul.
When I pause to look inward, I honestly have to admit; I am madder this year than last year. I’m angry over the pandemic, the loss of life, and the path of disabling health it has left in many folk’s lives. I’m angry at the media and their coverage of just about everything. I’m downright frustrated over the election and outcomes. I am doubly frustrated over other people’s indignant attitudes about the legalities of the whole process. I’m ticked about wearing a mask all the time. And even more ticked that other folks don’t wear masks at all. I am furious how much violence has erupted in and around me that has hurt people and their places of business. I see red every time the culture I live in attacks the goodness of God, His intentions, and commandments of how He has designed us to live. Upon review, it doesn’t take long for me to identify that I am, as they say, about to bite someone’s head off. Even though I don’t really feel angry most of the time, I recognize issues under the surface that affect me sometimes more than I am willing to admit.
The Bible has plenty to say about anger and how to manage it. Anger, in itself, is not a sin. It is a healthy emotion that God placed within us to send an alarm to us that we are either about to be or are being threatened at some level. Anger warns us that our boundaries may be compromised and that defending or disengaging may be a necessary behavior that is warranted. Where we get into trouble is how we express our anger. The bible states in Ephesians 4:26 ‘Be angry and sin not.” I find I have no problem with the first directive in this verse; It’s the second that gets me. The “don’t sin” part takes maturity in the word of God, self-control of temperament guided and influenced by the Holy Spirit and the spiritual gift of patience among other things. For I am convinced, it is possible to be angry and not sin. If it weren’t, God would not have put it as He did in scripture. But it sure can be a struggle.
Other people in the scriptures have had struggles with anger management as well. Moses came down from the mountain and was righteously angry at the Israelites for partying shamelessly and worshipping idols. Moses was so mad that he threw down the stone tablets containing the Ten Commandments and broke them. Peter rose up in anger and sliced off the ear of a servant of the high priest during Jesus’s arrest. Even Paul and Barnabus had an argument that resulted in splitting up their ministry.
Obviously, most of this behavior fell short of the “don’t sin” target, but even though they were angry and blew it big time, God took both the people and the circumstances and reconciled them. Moses displayed similar wrath toward the Israelites that God Himself displayed toward the people for their unfaithfulness. Moses interceded on behalf of the people and asked God to show mercy. When Moses came down and found them recklessly abandoning the law of God that would bring blessing to the Israelite nation, Moses threw down the tablets and broke them. What happened next is that God interceded on behalf of the people to Moses, and after 40 days of communing together, Moses returned to the people off the mountain with his face shining from God’s glory along with the covenant of God and the ten commandments.
Jesus rebuked Peter’s anger, healed the servant’s ear, called a halt to the violence among the disciples, and questioned Peter about Peter’s desire for Jesus to follow the Father’s will even in that hour. This is not the first time Peter was rebuked for trying to dissuade Jesus from facing the cross. Peter requested Jesus to deny that he was headed to death and received the rebuke of “Get behind me, Satan.” This was right after the experience Peter had had with Christ on the Mount of Transfiguration along with James and John. Later, Peter was so frustrated about how things were going after Jesus’s death. In exasperation, he returned to fishing. Peter had more than his share of outbursts.
Though the scriptures do not record that Paul and Barnabus ever saw each other again after their disagreement, Paul does mention fondly that Barnabus is worthy of monetary support for his work proclaiming the gospel. (1 Cor 9:6) Also, Paul and Barnabus both branched out in ministry the area of the gospel was “doubled.” Paul also later sends for John Mark, who they argued over, and uses John Mark in ministry. (2 Tim.4:11) What might have been discord resulted in harmonious expansion and distribution of the good news of Christ.
In all these situations and others like them, we see that anger can impact the direction of circumstances in many ways. Just like the woman wearing the t-shirt, my behavior and attitude can be a walking advertisement for how much I haven’t resolved. In the world we live in, there is plenty to get us steamed. How I manage my anger may very well be the most prominent testimony I can have for Christ. Either for the good or bad.
The Bible says,
Be slow to anger… James 1:19, also listed here is “be quick to listen and slow to speak.” When I do speak, I’m advised in Proverbs 15 to use “soft words” to disarm anger. Ephesians 4:27 warns me away from stewing on anger, primarily through the night. I am told to be forgiving even if I am angry. This makes the case that I can be mad but not harbor things. If I move in forgiveness, it will steer me away from the fury and bitterness that spurs me on for vengeance. This means don’t feed my anger. I should starve it. I shouldn’t feed it time or energy. Or thought. I should confess it in prayer and move on if I remember that God is a God of justice as well as love. I can use my anger in a way that honors Him. It is possible to regulate my anger without repressing it.
Having a goal about controlling anger is good, and putting a process in place will help us “not sin” when we are angry. But the glorious benefit is even though I might struggle with anger over many things, God still loves me, and being mad doesn’t disqualify me from being used by Him. His love and justice are grand and broad enough to cover, absorb, and dissolve the things that get my dander up. It is even powerful enough to calm the fury of the human heart in its worst state of rage if we just confess it to Him. And keep confessing it as often as we would entertain it. Or rehearse it. We have to admit that sometimes being mad is fun. It brings a naughty pleasure to our flesh to self-indulge our tempers and temporarily engage our tongues to give others a piece of our minds. As I grow older and try to walk closer to Christ, I find I can’t afford to give that peace of mind away. I need it. I need the energy that anger can consume. I need the valuable time to cherish the good things God has blessed me with instead of whiling away the hours rehearsing why I am justified in being so mad.
I have a few friends in the faith that have grown into an accountability group. We know each other’s hot buttons and occasionally even push them unintentionally. Even though we get worked up from time to time, we have adopted the song from “Frozen” as our prescription for anger management. “Let it GO, Let It GO…”As soon as one of us starts singing it, it reminds us even though we are angry; there is a choice. There is always a choice.
Just two more visits to the vineyard in the “Even though” series, and then the 5 o’clock worker will start the advent season with a new series entitled “The Invitation.”
5oclockworker.com 