The Real Cost of Window Shopping

I don’t usually use the translation of the Message for the scripture I reflect on, but I felt this particular passage conveyed the words of Christ well for the 21st-century mindset. These words get right to the spirit of the uncommon word in our time…”Lust.” In the original text, Jesus addresses the sin of adultery by revealing the underlying cause, which is…”lust’. A longing or desire, usually sexual in nature, for someone who is not your marriage partner. In our culture, even marital lines have become blurred as many have moved away from the concept that a sexual relationship was designed by the Lord inside the bonds of matrimony. Marriage terms have often been replaced by “a committed relationship,” and words like wife and husband have been rephrased into “mate, partner, significant other, etc.” But this passage doesn’t just speak to the married; it addresses all of us and the trouble of controlling our desires and longings. It also relates that if we entertain these longings, we are as guilty as w if we have committed it.

Having taught the bible to various demographics, folks, women in particular. have shared that they feel the sin of lust is often a problem more for men than women. While science and empirical evidence reveal that women and men by design are different in sexuality, the problem with lust is a people problem. While the heartbreaking numbers of those involved in pornography(primarily men) have skyrocketed, the statistics show that 82% of people who read romance fiction are women. Many of the romance novels published are considered “erotic” in nature and are defined as a happy-ever-after story with a lot of sex and spice. Suffice it to say window shopping for junky sinful stuff is a universal struggle.

If we take the words of Christ to heart and begin the dissection of what is behind lust, we often discover that lust is born out of vacancy. An empty place that we as humans are longing to be filled. God made us with the capacity to relate deeply. His design was for me to, first and foremost, relate to Him. This is what the finished work of Christ accomplished. If I stay committed to nurturing my relationship with Jesus through the help of the Holy Spirit, the emptiness and vacancy is fulfilled. The longing for what is righteous and what God has for me specifically is satisfied. However, suppose I begin to be distracted and answer what I like to refer to as the “telemarketer calls”of my selfish flesh. In that case, I can easily begin to long for what I “feel” might be more satisfying and pleasurable. This happened to Eve. The scriptures tell when Eve considered and saw that the forbidden fruit was more appealing, she took it. That particular window-shopping excursion cost mankind the boot from paradise.

Lust isn’t limited to sex. It can involve the lust for a lifestyle that we feel despite the hard work we are entitled to. We can window shop for relational fulfillment. I have counseled many a gal who says while they remained physically faithful to their husbands, they have had emotional affairs with coworkers and folks at church that they minister alongside. Trying to fulfill an empty spot that perhaps their spouse is either unaware or not interested in can be dangerous.We can lust after success and power, recognition, affirmation, etc., to the point where we can compromise our moral standards and turn to dishonesty, cheating, and even stealing to obtain it. We have seen this in the headlines too many times to deny it. This just doesn’t just happen in the unbelievers’ lives. I have seen folks at church scramble for what they thought was a more important position that gave them what they viewed as a higher place in the pecking order. Some people pursue relationships with church staff not just to support them but to a sense of belonging to the “inner sanctum.” Most of these individuals will let you know they have secured this status. My grandfather and father were both in ministry, so I have seen this firsthand. It is born out of a lustful spirit to fulfill the vacancy. The drive to belong can cause us to wander away from the very one we belong to, and that is God, Himself. Usually, when Lust is the driver, pride is buckled in as the other front-seat passenger. We want what we want because our pride says we deserve the pleasure it can bring.

When we were raising a family, we did not have a lot of recreational funds. To get out of the house, I would take the children to the mall for fun, get a Coke or a treat and walk around window shopping. But the truth is, It wasn’t very much fun. I came home longing for things I could not afford and often had to extensively explain to the kids why we couldn’t buy what they saw and… wanted. Sometimes it led to crying and ugly moments. Often, even the furnishings I had and really liked seemed pale in comparison. I often struggled with a pervading sense of discontentment. Always wanting more. The Holy Spirit began to speak to me, and while I still enjoyed shopping with friends for small treats, I began to focus on the fellowship and the fun and get my heart off things. Lust is a problem. We often want what we cannot have or, worse, want what others have. Other people’s relationships, their children or grandchildren, homes, jobs, physical appearance, etc.

The trouble with exposing and entertaining my desires leads me away from embracing and experiencing what God has for me. It undermines my thankfulness and decreases the growth of gratitude. Lust nurses envy and jealousy. It causes distance relationally to others and steals my peace. It can morally bankrupt me and cause me to make choices I will painfully regret. Most of all, it cost me the intimate fellowship of the one who loves me most, Christ. Lust erects barriers between the Lord and I and can cause shame that will lead me to avoid His presence. Lust robs my prayer life of focus, intention, and purity. Because grace is so big, wide, and long, God meets me in my struggle. He can fill the vacancy if I will but let Him. The Holy Spirit can redirect my desires toward what is good, pleasing, and healthy. God does not need my holiness to make HIm more Holy; Jesus shared this moment on the mountain in His sermon to help me as a disciple to follow Him because it is what is best for me. He paid the debt of sin so I could be free. A truth that needs to saturate my thinking the next time I want to go window shopping.

Lord, I was born a wanting girl. Forgive me for all the times I have lusted after people, stuff, power, and pleasure more than you. Empty it out and Fill me with your presence. Jesus, only you can satisfy my soul. Keep my eyes on what you have for me and my heart from wandering away from you.

Come back next time when the 5 o’clock worker examines “Broken Promises” when the series “Moments on the Mountain ” continues.