The Paternity Test

When God began to draw my attention toward the topic of prayer, I found myself resistant. I had already decided what series I would do next. But God, as He does, redirected my steps and I found myself thinking, meditating and reading on the topic of prayer. I have never considered myself a prayer warrior. However, I was reminded in the process that reading, meditating and even reflecting on prayer isn’t the same as actually praying. I shared in my last blog that I had gone to the scriptures where Jesus instructed the disciples to pray, after they asked Him to teach them how (Luke 11). The words that Christ shared are some of the most prominent in scripture, and probably outside of the 23rd Psalm are the most committed to folk’s memory. What I am referring to of course is the Lord’s Prayer. 

While its words are precious and sacred, I consider it to be the model prayer. Jesus didn’t actually say in the original text, repeat these words verbatim. He said,”Pray in this manner” (Matt 6:9). Jesus gave the disciples a guideline to help them pray more effectively –and that guideline is timeless and as relevant for me today as it was back then to them. 

Right from the start, Jesus establishes that prayer is relational. It is a conversation between the Father and the individual (me). The words, “Our Father,” intend for us to focus on the personal aspect of prayer, while corporate prayer is a part our worship and liturgical experiences. The prayer closet is where most of our personal battles, struggles, confessions and insight are gained. 

The prayer closet allows for intimate time between the Father and His child to occur. Where there is invitation, security, acceptance and reassurance. These are the qualities I need to grow in my faith to trust my Father all the more. God’s fatherhood is such a deep reflection of His unconditional love that it merits a priority in my approach to Him in prayer. He is my Father and has proclaimed Himself to be “a father to the fatherless, to the widow, the poor”(Psalm 68). He has identified himself to be the “Everlasting Father” (Isaiah 9:6) God’s desire was and is so deep for me to grasp this concept of ‘father’ about Him that He sent Christ in the flesh so I could get a picture of Him. Jesus said “if you have seen me, you have seen the Father” (John 14:9).

I recognize that many folks don’t have a dad. Maybe you (a reader) did not grow up with a father figure, or may have had a father that was absent at work or sadly, emotionally checked out. More and more in our culture we come across people who do even know who their father is. Talk shows and reality shows are often centered around a pervading theme of “who is the father?” Often this premise is followed by a series of paternity tests (often involving more than one man) that are performed, and the real identity of the biological father is revealed. While this information can be revelational, the situations are often saturated with folks who have had identity crises, insecurities, heartbreak, sense of abandonment, etc., etc. When I see this, it reminds me that as a human being, I am not bound by my earthly circumstances alone, but that I have a heavenly Father that is more than willing and able to heal my heart. His faithfulness is infallible and His care is constant. 

I had the blessing of having a great dad. After he and my mom had adopted me at 3 months of age, he was all in. My dad was hands on, tender, dependable, and kind. In every way he assured me I was his own and his beloved child. As a part of a closed adoption growing up, my folks and I had no idea or sense of my health background, ethnicity, heritage, etc. Dad did his very best to provide a connection for my brother and I.  He never wanted us to feel unwanted or alien. As a result, I grew up pretty secure in my identity and had no desire to pursue a biological identity. 

However, in 2001, I was contacted by the court system informing me that I had a biological half sibling who had petitioned the court to find me and would I be open to contact? (More on this in my series, The Chosen Life). When all was said and done, I got a peek at my original birth certificate. Lo and behold, no fathers’ name appeared on the record. Though my biological mother identified him to me, he was already deceased and neither could confirm or deny his paternity. She shared that because they were not married and he was a somewhat of an affluent business man in an ethnic community. They both agreed it would be better not to name him. I believe because of the care of a Dad, a stable willing father who had committed himself lovingly to me at the time of adoption, I remained unshaken by this unexpected revelation. 

Years later through ancestry, I took a dna test and relatives and ethnicity were confirmed. My biological mother had been truthful regarding my paternity. While it was good to know health history and nationality, it changed nothing about who my father was. My father was Ed. The guy who took me in, called me his own, nursed my wounds, counseled my conflicts.

But more importantly, He taught me about the faithful infallible father, God. As good as Ed was, he claimed he was nothing compared to our heavenly father and that everything he knew that was good about being a dad, came ultimately from God. The revelation that came out of that period of my life reinforced that God is the ultimate father. God never denies our existence or us because we are made in His image. He loves us passionately. 

I share this as often as I can, especially for folks who have not had an Ed in their life. I believe it is the message of hope and can bring restoration to broken lives left scarred by unfaithful fathers. But the application doesn’t stop there. It’s a reminder for all of us who have had dads. There is no father like God. Human dads fail, struggle, have flaws, age and face death, and cannot rescue or deliver us from the trials of life. But God can. He alone is our salvation. His grace alone can do me what my earthly dad could not. God saved my soul.

Our Father who is in Heaven, bridged the gap between His majestic heaven and this beautiful but troubled world when he sent Christ. Christ’s arrival on this planet and His death on the cross are the ultimate results of the greatest paternity test of the ages. God is our father. He has publicly proclaimed me as His own and has invited me into His family. Moment by moment, He is constantly waiting for me and invites me to partake of His fellowship and bring Him my petitions. It was good for me to be reminded, prayer is sooo personal. I am sad about all the times I passed opportunities to be alone with the Father. 

Join me again when I look at how powerful prayer is because of a name.

Sharon Bundo,
5 o’clock worker